Wishing Upon A star

2006-03-09T08:36:00.000-08:00

Im really glad to be back writting again. I hope yall habe fun reading it. I really missed all of yall. My life is gone pretty good now. Im talking to my mom again. Well kinda. She talks and I try to stay kool with things she says. Yes its hard for me. You know my mouth. I like to say whats on my mind. Awww shaaa my little friend just walked in the door. She just made 2 years old. Cute as a button. It wont be long she will be sitting on my lap hitting the keys. lol I love that little kid. Well yet me go play with her a a little bit. I will be back later.

2006-03-09T08:22:00.000-08:00

Oh what a night at work. Big boss was there. That man can sure bitch like a old lady. Everyone was on there toes. Fuck him. I did what I always do. (nothing) lol Im saving all my money and one day I will tell that asshole where he can put his strip club. Till then , I will just smile cute for him and bring him a drink. An hope the asshole passes out soon. Love you to Mark......................................................................................................Baby Dee your best dead head in the place.

2006-03-08T06:29:00.000-08:00

Oh heres a tip for you drink more beer.

2006-03-08T06:13:00.000-08:00

Oh I forgot, Im sally home maker now.Im making bunnies for all the kids at church and down the street. The little ones are for church kids. Im gont to put candy in them. Oh there mom,s will love me. lol I will have all the kids off the wall. Thats what i like about kids, you can wire them up and send them sweet little kids home. when I was little one year my mom got me a basket of candy and a stuff bunny. I think that was the only time I got one. Guess she was to busy. Oh well Im not gone to down her for that now. so what you think? Do yuo think Im a good Sally home maker. I think they comming out cute. Well I will hop away and i will talk to you later. have a great day. Tammy Dee

2006-03-07T16:51:00.000-08:00

Hello Im back, I was asked to start writting again. So this ones for you Sassy. Well let me see whats new in my life. mmmm nothing. Not a damn thing. Same old shit , just another day. School, work , and a little licking. Guess Im a boring person. lol

Well how are my friends out there? Hope yall are doing ok. Sassy tell my little man hello and I miss talking to him. he is a sweetheart. Arron be good for your mom and help her with your little sister. Oh you better be good the big bunny will be watching you. If you bad you will only get rotton eggs in your basket. So be good my little man. an I hope to talk to you soon. Love Baby Dee

2006-02-01T11:33:00.000-08:00

Hello my friends. Whats up? I just got home from drip. Yes Im feeling fine, Im not crying aboyt it so you feel sorry for me. Well Im off tonight. They having something at work to night that I cant be there. They will have to many cops in there. An Im just 18 so I shouldnt be in there any way. Damn I miss all the fun. lol Well I been doing pretty good the past few days. School is keeping me so busy. I think Im doing pretty good on my test. I made one B. Oh well I will do better next time. I guess I will start writting again everyday. I miss not writting. Purple kiss for you and i will talk later.

2006-01-31T06:47:00.000-08:00

Some wheres above the coluds you are watching over me. Soon it will be the day he took you home. Momma lady I miss you so much. But I know you in a better place now. No pain . Alot of things have changed sence you gone. You have a new grand grand baby . He is so cute. And the girls are geting so big. I hear paw daddy has a girl friend. No she can never take your place . But I know you would not want him to be alone. An did you hear Pam had a tumor in her head again. Well she is doing good. I went see her a few weeks ago. I seen Heather to. It wont be long she will be with you. She is still doing crack. I know if you was here you would beat her ass good. Well momma Lady candi and I are doing good. We are still gone to the park for our long heart to heart talks. Well a few days ago life got a little hard for me. I hit the bottle. But I got my head back on the right path again. It was a few weeks I didnt talk to my mom. Yesterday i took her call. It was nice hearing her voice. We really had a good talk. I let her say what was on her mind and I didnt bitch. A friend on line told me to do that. an i think it worked. I got on the phone not mad are upset. well I had a new port put in . the baby pulled the other one out. well I guess you know that all ready. because I know you still with me at all times watching over me. Well mamma lady I guess I better go now. I got school today. I just wanted to write to you and let you know Im ok and Im thinking of you. Love you always and hope we meet again. Love Tammy

2006-01-31T06:25:00.000-08:00

Happy Birthday Jessica, Hope you have a good one. Sorry I cant be there to party with you. Love you sister.

2006-01-24T23:19:00.000-08:00

Oh Im starting this year off so fucking great. Its 3 weeks I didnt talk to my mom and i trip to the hosp. Way to go Tammy. Yes im drinking again. I cant help it , I need it.I feel so lost in this big world. I know I will be mad at myself for drinking. But I cant help it. Life gets the best of me. Well if its gone to kill me. I dont want to feel a thing. drinking makes things so easy. This drinks for you dear sweet mom.

2006-01-24T22:40:00.000-08:00

well I just got home today. I was in the hosp getting a new port put in. I was holding my friends baby and he pulled the port I had out. Wooooo talk about hurt. That little shit can pull hard. lol I should have known better. All the rolling around Candi and I do in bed and it took a little shit to pull it out.

2006-01-23T06:49:00.000-08:00

Well its me again. I know its been a long time I didnt write. Well I been a little crazy with my life. Only thing thats staying the same is Candi,s fine ass. lol Well My mom and I are not talking again. It took a friend online to open my eyes. He told me I need to live with the way things are. Well I guess he is right. I need to stop wanting her to life my life. Well Mom I will still love you even if you not my kind of person.

2006-01-04T07:21:00.000-08:00

There's only one you. No one else, ever. There's only one you. For now and forever. There's only one dream. The dream that we share,Though life used to seem. So empty as air. There's only one you. To others I'm blind. You're really unique. Just one of a kind. There's only one love. How easy to see. There's only one you. For always, for me.

2006-01-04T07:09:00.000-08:00

The way she make's me feel is like no other. The way she can make me smile, even when it seems the worse of day's. The way she touch's me, sending shivers threw out my body. The sweet words she wishper's in my ear late at nite. The soft kisses she places on my forehead as the sun rises to day. The many lil cute face expression's I see her make threw out the day, and the way her eye's light up when she's happy.
The way she grabs onto me while watching a scary movie. The soft sweet sound of her giggle while making out, the way she looks deep into my eye's when she say's I love you. The many way's she makes it known that I'm her gurl and she wants us forever. The way she dances when one of her favorite songs comes on.
And yet I keep thinking threw this all wondering how it is that I found the most perfect woman. She has eveything one could ever wish for, if not more. She's my sunshine when all seem's dark and gray. She makes me long to be a better person inside and out, she has brought so many wonderful things into my life. I guess when all is said and done nothing compare's to the love that come's from the heart of your true love. ............................................Love you Candi

2006-01-04T06:20:00.000-08:00

I met a new friend today. Her name is Dixie. She,s a sweetheart. Dixie I thank you for being you. You are a sweet person that came into my life. I think yuo gone to make me smile alot in the new year. An I hope I give it back to you with a big smile. The long talk means so much to me. Thank you for caring. Love you Dixie for it. dixie your kids are so lucky to call you there mom. I just ask one thing of you. Love them with all your heart and keep up the good work. You the only mom they will ever have. .............................. love baby dee

2006-01-04T05:57:00.000-08:00

God knew what he was doing when he said , Let this be a New Year. It,s like starting all over . A new year. A year to make things better. Making new friends and loving the old ones more. Im starting this year off right. I will pray more and care about others. I know if I do that he will give me a better year. An this year my mom is geting out of jail, I will even try to get alone with her. Even if we dont see eye to eye. she is still my mom. If it wasnt for her I wouldnt be here. So I have alot to be thankfull for. I got more then I could ever ask for. I got life.

2005-12-31T06:52:00.000-08:00

Well Mom this is gone to be your last New years in jail. You will be out soon. Hope you got your head on right. Geting out will be a new step for you. In the pass 4 years you been there so many things changed. Im not that little girl you knew. Im thinking on my own now. An Im doing pretty good at it. Well I think Im doing good. PPl around me still say Im tard. lol You know who you are. (Froggie) Well I have just a few words to tell you. Walk straight or Walk away from me. Mom Im doing to good for you not to. I hope you understand. I cant live your life for you. An I will not let you walk in my life and fuck it up. So walk stranght or walk the other away. Yes Im not gone to lie. I do miss and love you. But its something I need to do for myself.

2005-12-31T06:30:00.000-08:00

Well I know its been a few days I didnt write. I been so sick. But my head is still looking up to him and Im praying. He will make me strong. I still have alot to be thankful for. An I know if I keep my head up he will show me a better way of living.

2005-12-31T06:18:00.000-08:00

Well its almost New Years. An its time to party. We waiting for a full house at work. Oh 6 beers and everyone will be looking good. Candi went shopping for Party hat and things. Hope everyone has a good time. Candi Im ready for my kisss sweetie. Well candi you made this year the best year of my life again. Its geting better and better. Love you. well if I dont talk to yall my friends , Hope you have a safe and happy New Year. an dont drink to much. Oh shit I cant beleive Im saying dont drink to much. funny how when you sick you say things,

2005-12-31T06:12:00.000-08:00

Here is one lady that means the world to me. Kris you as pretty as ever. Glad to see you found a little happness in your life. You really look like a daddys little girl there. Hug that good looking old man for me. Kris stay sweet as you are and I know you will be happy to the end. .....Love you much...............baby dee

2005-12-31T06:07:00.000-08:00

Well I was kinda in a bad mood all week. My foster mom Pam is in hosp. They found a tumor in her head. They had to take is out. She,s doing well , but waiting for the lab work to see if its cancer. I hope the flowers I sent her cheers her up a little. sorry I cant be there for her. but she knows I love her and Im praying for her. Get well soon Pam Im not losing you to. Love Tammy

2005-12-31T05:57:00.000-08:00

Awww may Shaaa yall to cute. Well there are two crazy friends I work with. They tied the knot at work . They had a strip club wedding. It was so kool. They danced the pole all night. If, no I should say when, me and Candi get married I want a wedding like that. It was so cute. Way to go you two and Love you both.

2005-12-27T07:54:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow will come and it could be your last.Don't waste time trying to fix the past.Just enjoy each day as if it were your last.For that day will come and you life will be the past.

2005-12-27T07:40:00.000-08:00

Hope you having a nice day. An dont work to hard my tard sweetie. Im sending you the best gift. My big juicy kiss. Love you Froggie..........................................Love Tammy

2005-12-27T07:38:00.000-08:00

Im praying for sassy,s family. There grandman passed away today. Sassy I will be thinking of you today. I know yall will miss her dearly. Just remember she,s gone to a better place. She wont be sick are hurt any more. An dont think it as saying good-bye. She is just gone ahead of yall. You will see her again. So go to her and tell her love you and see you later grandma.

2005-12-27T07:09:00.000-08:00

Lord Lord, why do they eat turkey when there is pussy . Save the trurkey and eat more pussy this holiday. It does a body good. You will be saying yummy and gone back for seconds.

2005-12-27T06:49:00.000-08:00

Hello my friends, hope everyone had a great Christmas. It was nice here. Alot of friends and family fulled the house here. They had food and drinking in every corner you went in. Hope yall wasnt to busy to forget church. That was the first thing Candi and I did. Church first then party after. I think Candi liked the gifts I got her. I got alot to. Im lips are hurting from all the kisses I got that day. Every time someone would pass by I got a big hug and kiss. I think them men was likeing it a little to much. Well house was full of toys . Oh I got a few toys to. lol Well I did good not drinking. I only had one glass of wine. Candi was watching me . She can watch my ass anytime, Im, watching hers. lol Well gone take a shower , but I will be back soon.

2005-12-27T06:41:00.000-08:00

Awww Shaaaa , Sara you look cute as Mrs Santa. Wendy is lucky to have a sweet little thing like you.

2005-12-27T06:17:00.000-08:00

To the sweet little bad girls next door, You,ve been naughty, so here,s the scoop. All you get for Christmas is Reindeer POOP. Love you Mandy, Anggie, Bailey, Tabby. be good this year. .............................Tammy

2005-12-23T05:37:00.000-08:00

I spent my life not knowing whyI lived with pain and fear.I was my greatest enemy.I shed a lonely tear.I sought to find a softer path.I stumbled and I fell.I looked everywhere except inside.I lived an earthly hell.I found that what I feared the mostWas me and the way I feel.I'd covered up my child insideWith beer instead of what's real.But I finally found the secret.God knows how I pushed and shoved.The greatest thing I discoveredIs the fact that I can love ... and be loved

2005-12-23T05:21:00.000-08:00

Roses are red, pickles are green I love your legs and whats between,,,,,,,,,,,,,I like your style I like your class but most of all I like your ass,,,,,,,,,,,,,,Im a cool girl, in a cool townit takes a real mother fucker to put me down kissing is a sport fucking is a game guys get all the pleasure girls get all the pain,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,The guy says I love you. you believe its true. 9 months later,he says the hell with you.the baby is a bastard .the mother is a whore. all this wouldnt have happened if the rubber wouldnt have torn.,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,Roses are red,Violets are corney,When I think of you Ohh baby I get horney,Eat me,Beat me,Bite me,Blow me, Suck me, Fuck me,Very slowly.if you kiss me, dont be sassy,Use your tongue and make it nasty!!!!

2005-12-23T04:56:00.000-08:00

Good morning my friends, Sorry I didnt write in a few days. I been sick. Yea Yea thats my story and Im sticking to it. They up my drip, so its stronger now. And its kicking my ass again. something about my # count was off a little. Hell my head is a little off to but they not fixing that. Well we have 2 more days till Christmas. Kids here cant wait. Yesterday they had a party at school. Kids was on a sugar high. Great now they off for 2 weeks. Guess they will be here geting on my last nerve. Im off work tonight and they want to sleep over already. Hell no they can bug there mom. I still have a little shopping I need to do. I still didnt get My outfit. They way I need feeling I may go in my robe. An say shit on it all. Well Im gone take a shower. I need to wash my hair. Im having a bad hair day. lol I will talk to yall later.

2005-12-23T04:44:00.000-08:00

I don’t want to leave you. But if God calls meI hope that you understand. I can’t say no. I will always be with you. if you keep me in your heart and in your thoughts. I will never be gone.
I am fitting with all that I have to get better.I hate this drip. I hate that is hurting you. I promised you that I will be strong and that I will fight,but please understandthat if God calls meI can't say no.

2005-12-21T11:14:00.000-08:00

Take my hand. Walk with me. Let me show you. What there is to see. Look in my eyes. Feel my heart. Don't let the world around. Tear it apart----- It's real----- It's true----- It's me----- It's you----Life is short. Yet seems so long. What feels right. Can't be wrong. Lay with me. Feel me breath. Believe me now. It's not a dream----- It's real----- It's true----- It's me----- It's you----- Just take my hand. I will show you a new way. ---- One last christmas in jail------Love you

2005-12-21T10:58:00.000-08:00

Roses are red, Violets are corney ,When I think of you, Ohh baby I get horney, Eat me, Beat me, Bite me, Blow me, Suck me, Fuck me, Very slowly , if you kiss me ,dont be sassy, Use your tongue and make it nasty!!!!

2005-12-21T09:54:00.000-08:00

Sending a E-mail to Santa, Santa I have a few things I want to tell you before to take your long trip around the world. Please dont forget the poor little kids around the world. I want to see every little face with a big smile that day. An if you cannt please make them safe and feel gods love in there heart. One more thing Santa, You dont need to stop at my house. I have everything I need. Send my giftes to a poor mom that is working her butt off just to feed her kids. She needs it more then me. I cant think of one thing I would really need are want in my life. I got the better gift. I got God in my life. An a sweetie to keep me smiling. But Santa if you need a rest I have a nice chair you can rest in. I will put out some cookies and milk for you. My grandma next door makes the best cookies in the world. ........................................................................................................................Love Tammy

2005-12-21T06:01:00.000-08:00

Hello everyone, Its me again. I just dropped in to say hey. I got you a hot cup of coffe. So pull a chair and we can have a little chat. I like talking to you. Hope your night was good. Mine was ok I guess. I met two sweet ladies on line last night. Im hoping to talk to them a little more. It,s always nice to meet new friends and hear there life story. An I really like chating with my old ones to. Well we only have a few more days before Christmas. Hell Im not ready for this, its comeing to fast. I need to get my ass busy. I still have a few ppl to get for. An I dont know what to get them. What you get a person that has everything. I guess a fast kick and send them on there way. lol Awww shaaa my sweetie is looking so sweet today. She is just waking up. She looks so sexy with her hair all wild and walking around the house in her robe. I love that girl so much. We going shopping today. We looking for a christmas outfit. I think I want pants this time. Its to cold for a dress. Talking about dress, I better go get dress. Well my friends hope you have a nice day and keep smiling. Life is not that bad.

2005-12-20T17:06:00.000-08:00

Tammy is three and when she's bad
her mother dances with her.
She puts on the record,
"Red Roses for a Blue Lady"
and throws her across the room.
Mind you,
she never laid a hand on her.
She gets red roses in different places,
the head, that time she was as sleepy as a river,
the back, that time she was a broken scarecrow,
the arm like a diamond had bitten it,
the leg, twisted like a licorice stick,
all the dance they did together,
Blue Lady and Tammy.
You fell, she said, just remember you fell.
I fell, is all she told the doctors
in the big hospital. A nice lady came
and asked her questions but because
she didn't want to be sent away she said, I fell.
She never said anything else although she could talk fine.
she never told about the music
or how she'd sing and shout
holding her up and throwing her.
she pretends she is her ball.
she tries to fold up and bounce
but she squashes like fruit.
For she loves Blue Lady and the spots
of red roses she gives her

2005-12-20T07:03:00.000-08:00

Hello my friends, Im back from our trip. Well Im never gone back to Wisconsin. That place sucks. The food sucks. No Taco Bell there. An if they had one I sure didnt see it. The ppl are not like in Louisiana. An they call us assholes lol. Well I will be a asshole any day. There is nothing there for me. An it was so cold. Candi and I stayed in the room the hold time. They laughed at us for not wanting to ski. Hell if I want to stay on my ass I will drink not ski. So you can say Im really glad to be back home. An Im never gone there again.

2005-12-19T11:14:00.000-08:00

I'm sorry Mommy I can't be whom you want me to be . I promise I tried. I tried to be straight for you. But I was so unhappy. Now that I am me. Your unhappy. Sorry Mommy One day you will see me for me. And you might just be happy. But until then Sorry Mommy. I used to believe you were never wrong. Now I see your human. And you make mistakes too. Your not perfect. Sorry Mommy. I will love you till I die. Hope you love me till you do. But its your loss Mommy Not mine. Your missing out. Not me . Sorry Mommy. I still love you Mommy no matter how you feel. I will remember the good times more than the bad. Love your Baby Dee ----------

2005-12-16T14:34:00.000-08:00

I'll never forget a loveI experienced for the very first time.The heading on the door said Rm: 69. I slowly opened the door. She was sitting on the bed, Motioning for me to come closer As doubts ran through my head. She undressed me with her eyes And gently caressed my skin.I've never given a woman my body. I thought, Could she possible win? My flesh became weak.I couldn't fight it no more. I lust for her love, Give it like I've never had it before. As our lips collide, Emotions ran through my mind.Is it right? Is it wrong? Am I wasting my time? But all of that didn't matter. I wanted to give it a try. I'm hooked! I love it! So to Men, I say, "Good-bye"

2005-12-16T14:08:00.000-08:00

Oh Im so tired today. I dont know if its the drip today are work last night. I just know Im so tired. Well today is the day. Its his b-day. I hated to see this day come. But I made it. Only a few tears fell. Im doing good. I guess thats a good thing. It shows I have a heart. Well candi and I went eat lunch at the po-boy house. It was kinda good. I got a roast beef and Candi got shrimp. We took half if it home in a doggie bag. Well Im off tonight. so I guess I will be in a chat room are doing school work. Tabby got her head sewed up yesterday. They should have sewed her mouth to. That kid can bitch your head off. Well Im gone take a nap, maybe that will help me feel better. .............later friends

2005-12-16T13:59:00.000-08:00

This is Mandy. She is one of the bad girls next door. She is 8 years old. She is looking for a talking frog. lol Froggie theres your mean little friend.

2005-12-15T16:17:00.000-08:00

Jesie you looking fine as ever. Jesie is the one that does my all my work at the club. I just sit there and run my mouth to him as he works. You doing a good job Jesie. Keep up the good work. lol. Well all you ladies out there Jesie is a free man. Show us what you got No dont I seen it the other night. Shhhh. I walked in on him in the bathroom. Im not telling how big it is. @===========> yea you wish lol . Jesie Im still waiting for that dance with you.

2005-12-15T13:58:00.000-08:00

This is Tommy the one we live with. He,s a 52 year old married man. The thinks he is the shit married to a young girl. They have 8 kids together and he has a few here and there. Tommy you the man. If you want me to shut my mouth pay me lol.

2005-12-15T10:10:00.000-08:00

Great more snow. We are waitting for more snow this week. Thats all we need. Its so cold now. An the snow is pretty but I would like to see a little sun here and there. Talk about cold coming home after work at 3 oclock. My ass was shaking the car home. Talk about cheap on gas. lol Well i work again tonight. I cant wait for Friday , Im off. I need to get my ass to the store this weekend. I still didnt get my sweetie and thing for Christmas. Well we gone on our trip on the 17-18-19. cant wait. That should be fun. I talked to Pam today. She is hurting today. she said its the cold thats geting to her bones. Other then that she is fine. She was baby-sitting her grandkids. An her hubby was at hosp. His daddy is not doing good. he had fluid arould his heart. They was gone in and seeing if they could take it out. I will keep him in my prayers. Pam was calling around looking for Heather. It,s two weeks she didnt talk to her. she must be on the street all cracked out her mind. That girl will not see 19 years old. Pam is sick over that. Well I better go see if Candi wants to eat today are not. I kinda need a little something in my belly. Talk to yall later. An hope yall have a warm and happy day.

2005-12-15T09:34:00.000-08:00

its a crazy day. Candi just sat on her glasses. Yep she broke them. Great sweet you gone to be blind as a bat now. You will never find the hole now. lol ...... No she just wears them to read. ............ Sandi just got called Tabby fell and cut her head open at school. Thats one of the bad girls Im always talking about. Guess thats a trip to the hosp now..........................Froggie is going on a lunch and movie date with some guy from work. I think he,s turning gay on us. lol ....................An kriss is still head over heals in love with some dude. Way to go Krisss................An my mommy just called me just to say she missed me.... Yea I said this day was crazy. She must want money in her account. ................... What will be next on this crazy day. Maybe I will fall asleep and wake up and it was just a dream my foster mom and Herbert is gone. Yea Yea its not that crazy of a day. Only crazy one thinking that is me. Oh well snap out of it. Tammy get back in the real world. You still Tard. The talking frog said you are. ...........................LOL

2005-12-15T09:16:00.000-08:00

To my little man, I see you being a good boy today. Im glad you helping your mommy with your baby sister. Thats what big brothers do. An you better clean your bedroom , you a big boy now. Santa wants to see a clean bedroom when he goes to your house on Christmas day. Aron I think you a smart little boy. So I know you being good for mommy. You better santa is watching you. An he is making a list of all the good little boys and girls. Aron I love you little man..............................baby dee

2005-12-15T08:37:00.000-08:00

EXTRA... This word makes me stop and compare what I've accomplished, with what I could accomplish, if I went that (extra) mile and made up with a neighbor, if I donated an (extra) dollar to the Salvation Army, if I prayed an (extra) half hour, or spent that ( extra) time with my child, or gave myself some (extra) time to do what makes me happy. We're so used to doing things by the clock, the calendar, and by the routine we've created for ourselves that we never know the blessings we'd experience if we'd done a little (EXTRA) in any area of our life. Why settle for a quick kiss when a passionate one can help you reconnect with the one you love? Or why give a quick hug when a bear hug feels so much better, and says so much more? Why be sad when we're rejected when we can give some (Extra) attention to somebody who is lonely and desperately needing to feel as if he matters? Doing a little (EXTRA) than we usually do can make others feel happier, more loved and appreciated, and after all, isn't that what all of us want?

2005-12-15T08:33:00.000-08:00

Stop pointing the finger on everyone else. Im so trid of hearing the assholes in New Orleans. Who gives a shit who did what. Get over it and move on. They need to stop blaming everyone and fix things so it dont happen again. Yes my heart goes out to the ones that dead and the family that lost them. But they in a better place now. We need to fix the problem now. An watch where all that money is gone. Them assholes are gone to spend all that money and next year we gone to see it all over again. Mark my word. The streets will flood again. Because there are to many assholes blaming each other. Stop it now and fix the problem.

2005-12-15T06:17:00.000-08:00

One little rose for my sweetie. It may stand in that little vase alone. But that one pink rose has more love then 12 standing there. Candi if I could I would give you a garden of pink roses. But I give you this one. This one smells sweet and is as pretty as you are. Candi I want you to know everyday how much I love you. An I thank you for being there for me. I know I give you hell. An you still stand there pretty as that pink little rose standing there alone. So Candi stand tall and smile because you are the best. An I will still love you when there,s no more little pink roes standing there in that vase. Yea it will die. But my love for you will grow in my heart for you.

2005-12-15T05:57:00.000-08:00

Set my free. Help me stop the pain I have in my heart for you. If you dont love me give me back my heart you took from me. Set it free. Set it free so I can go on with my life. Years come and gone and you still dont set me free. I was not asked to be born. An I didnt pick you as my mom. So please if you dont want me , set me free. Im strong and I can fly now. So set me free if you dont love me.

2005-12-13T09:47:00.000-08:00

glad you stopped in for coffee. I will get you a cup and we can chat a little. We still have snow here. Its so pretty looking out the window and everything is white. I just got back from next door. sandi was making Christmas cookies for the kids. The snowman cookies are real cute. To bad I dont eat cookies. They smell good. Candi and I are off tonight. Yep ..... you heard me right. Candi is taking off work. lol Candi never does that. She must be sick. Nah she wants some of that sweet loving I give her. lol I think we just going shopping. candi wants to get gifts for everyone that works for her. I hope Im on that list. Well talking about list I need to get my sweetie something. I was thinking maybe a pair of earings and a chain. Iseen a pretty set at the mall. I dont know. She has the best gift here. ME.............lol

2005-12-10T06:27:00.000-08:00

Kris it was nice hearing your voice . Sorry I dont call you more. But you know how things are. Always running around . But it was nice to hear you doing so well. Hope it stays like that. It must be that love is in the air. It does magic. Well hugs and kisses to eveyone. Yes you to Toddy. you can stop crying.lol

2005-12-10T05:21:00.000-08:00

I see you. Glad you stopped by . Im always glad to see a happy face. Well it looks like we got to have a pretty day of snow again. Everything is white. Now its starting to feel a little like Christmas. Candi wants to go get a tree today. We dont need a tree to look at. We can look at each other. I can put a pretty red bow on her ass . She well look better then any old tree. Oh it so nice not having school . I got more time . Its hard with school and work. Oh well thats how things are. busy busy. The bad little girls from next door stayed over last night. I didnt get much rest with them. They had the music on and was dancing all over the house. Then they wanted to play some stupid card game. I never really got the hang of that game. Now Im watching them sleep. Thinking to myself. Hell no I dont want kids. I can see why ppl need drugs . well I better go take a shower and get dress . I need to be really awoke when they wake up. They to wild for me. I never seen wild 8 year olds like this before. One more thing I still see you and Im happy I do. .......................................see you later

2005-12-09T19:53:00.000-08:00

OMG******* thats why there is more lesbians in the world today. Where would you want us to put that thing. You cant even keep it in your pants. Its always hanging there . You dont even know where to put it yourself. I think you better keep that think to your self.

2005-12-09T18:03:00.000-08:00

Candi and I went to the mall today. No I didnt buy nothing for me. I went pick 3 angels off the tree in the mall. I picked 2 little boys and I little girl. Looks like they from the same family. It was the same handwritting. I headed to the toy store. The boys are 3 and 6. What would a little boy want? mmmm Well I got them a bike, football. An a race car set for the 6 year old. The 3 year old I got him a set of blocks. Then it was time for the little girl. Well she is 2. I got her a pretty doll with a buggy. An all little girls like tea sets. So I got her that. Then I went get them all a warm coat and hat. I hope it makes them happy. On I got them a bible story book to. There mom can read to them. An a kid should always have a teddy bear to hug at night. I got it wrapped and put in under the tree. Hope I make 3 little kids happy Christmas day.

2005-12-09T12:24:00.000-08:00

Hey girl, When I looked at youI’d never seen brown eyes so true Oh, something wonderful came over me You got to hear my cry for sympathy You drive me crazy Don’t know what to do You got me babyI’m so hooked on youYou drive me crazyWith the things you doYou got me baby Baby, you’re always on my mindI swear I think that you’re so fine Girl in time, love the way, the way you make me feelI know this time the feeling’s real You drive me crazy Don’t know what to do You got me babyI’m so into youYou drive me crazy With the things you do You got me baby.You must know you mean the world to meThere is no other love I can see Not a day comes by without me, knowin’ that i Want you, want you by my side for the rest of my life Everyday I think of you’cause I really like the way you make me feel It’s not what you do, it’s the way you do it (girl, it’s the way!) You know how to make my dreams come true

2005-12-09T12:04:00.000-08:00

well I was waiting to see how long before the drip made me sick. Its kicking my ass again. lol I said I was gone to fight this thing, but never said I was a good fighter. An I forgot to say, I always get my ass kicked. But one thing I can say, I never give up. I pick my ass up and go back for more. Next round please...............Thats the Tammy way.

2005-12-09T11:27:00.000-08:00

Awww Shaaa I think this pic is so cute. Well we knee deep in snow now. An Im freezing my tootie off. I had to be at hosp for 6 today. Im never telling them I want to go early again. At 6 its to damn cold. My poor baby was shaking. She was so cold and I couldnt warm her up. But I do say so myself, she looks cute shaking like that. When I got home I did a little house work , now I got free time to chat a little. hope its warmer where yall at. Hell we never happy. It was just last week we was saying where is the cold. Now we got it and we still bitching. Whats up with that my friends. Days like this is good to stay in bed with your sweetie. But life is going so fast , we jump out bed and run our self to dead. Well today I put the fireplace on in the bedroom. An where is my sweetie, next door geting her hair cut. damn lesbian girl friends are just like men. Im standing in the cold again with no loving lol. Well Im off work tonight. Guess I will see you then my friends......................... Have a good day.

2005-12-09T10:47:00.000-08:00

I was asked by Tammy to write something for all you wonderful people here about Disabled Parking Permits. I had started a thread in Casual Chat,which turned into a discussion between Tammy and I about this.I'm sure that many of you have the Disabled Parking Permits that allow youto park in the first spots when going to the malls or stores in your area. They are deserving and I feel something that too many able-bodied people take for granted that it's their right to park in that spot for a few minutes. Nothing gets me ire up more!Here in Toronto where I live, they are thinking of coming up with a way to make sure that these permits are not fraudulent by adding water shed marks to them. I think it is absolutely disgusting that people would do this. I had no idea it was a problem until I read the article in the paper.I also drive a city transit bus for a living. All of our new vehicles are low-floor wheelchair accessible buses. We can carry 2 mobility devices on the bus at one time. This makes most of our bus stops wheelchair accesible stops as well. Nothing bothers me more than people who park at those busstops illegally. Bad enough they park at a non-accessible stop, but when it's accesible it's drives me mad! If I have to offload a wheelchair or scooter, I can not do so safely. I can't off load someone onto the road! Usually it means pulling up behind the offending vehicle or in front of it,and making sure I can deploy my ramp properly so a person may exit safely.Personally, I'd love to see people who park in a handicapped parking spottowed. No questions asked, no running out to their car to plead for it to be removed from the tow truck. Tow it and pay the fees! I'd also love tosee the people who park at bus stops ticketed $100.00 for nonaccessiblestops and $200.00 for accessible stops. No going to court to fight those tickets and the revenue goes to the transit company so we can buy more accessible buses.I'm sure many of you have run into problems in your daily lives dealing with this. I want you to know, that most of us able bodied folks aren't that inconsiderate of you. You are human beings who deserve to be treatedwith the respect like everyone else.I'll get off my soapbox now...and you all have a good time talking about this one!Tracey

2005-12-09T10:12:00.000-08:00

Once again it's Christmas Time, time for us to be, Busy wrapping presents and setting up the tree. It seems we have so many things, to think of and to do, We may forget that Christmas, has a deeper meaning too. A meaning that goes far beyond, the things the eye can see, Such as Holly wreaths, Mistletoe, and Gifts beneath the tree. For these are only Symbols, of what happened Christmas morn, When in a little manger, GOD's only Son was born. GOD put HIM here upon this Earth, with one idea in mind. To put New Hope around the World, and LOVE in all Man kind. So even though we're busy, and have many things to do, Let's not forget that Christmas, has a deeper Meaning too.

2005-12-09T09:37:00.000-08:00

A little older and a little wiser without you mom i would be a little feistier We had our fights and shed our tears but when i needed you mom you were never there Forgivness wasnt always easy and trust wasnt always there but the one thing I could count on mom, was the pain we always shared A little braver and a lot stabler without you mom I would be a little plainer

2005-12-07T08:52:00.000-08:00

1- There is always at least one good thing in every day. It pays to search till we find that (one thing). If we don't, we wind up telling ourselves things that aren't true, like: "Today was rotten. Nothing is ever going to change." "Nobody cares about what happens to me," Or.. "Why try, it's not going to work out any way?"2- No matter how bad we see ourselves, there is somebody in our life who views us differently, and is quick to point out the good things about us.
3- Mistakes can't be undone, but God always forgives us for making them. He's always there to pick us up, brush us off give us a hug, and send uson our way.
4- Life might ZAP us once in awhile, but it also surprises with unexpected blessings that make us smile..***************************************************************************************

2005-12-07T08:36:00.000-08:00

HAPPY HOLIDAYS- IT'S HARD TO BELIEVE THAT IT'S TIME TO START THE COUNTDOWN FOR CHRISTMAS, BUT IT IS, AND I AM READY FOR ALL THAT COMES WITH IT: shining eyes and happy faces, laughter bouncing off the walls, the Christmas tree glowing in the dark, gift wrap paper and bows strewn across the floor, the pitter-patter of happy feet, a tired baby crying, children arguing over a toy, adults swapping jokes and embracing more than usual? And nothing makes Christmas better than listening to Elvis singing about a blue Christmas, and Bing Crosby about a white one. And how about that warm feeling that steals over you as you look at your loved ones - realizing how blessed you are.

2005-12-06T09:23:00.000-08:00

I hate the man that came up with the silly thig called a phone. This phone rings all day. My mom called me at 5 oclock. She is counting the days. I think she gets out of jail on June12. so she will be out for my birthday. It will be 4 years she didnt see me for my birthday. I think it will be nice to have her home again. I changed alot. An Im hopeing she did to. but if she didnt Im stronger now to face the problems she will give me. I think. lol Candi said if I want she can stay here till she gets her shit together. Its up to me. I dont think thats a good thing to do. Maybe it would be best if I rent her a little place till she gets on her feet. Some place not to far but not next door. Maybe like on the moon. lol So I can look up and see her if I want. Guess we will see about that problem when she gets out. Well its still cold here. Waitting for more snow. I made a little snowman with the bad girls. Im not good at makeing snowmen. Maybe next time I will make a snow woman. lol

2005-12-06T06:12:00.000-08:00

Well I licked it. I took my last test today. I think I did good. I dont go back to school till aftre the holidays. Good I need a break. Bet when you seen the pic, you said to yourself this was gone to be a hot one. ha ha ha . You so nasty. I really have a life without licking crack all the time. Well maybe not. That licking is pretty good. No my life is gone good. Im happy the way things are gone.

2005-12-06T05:59:00.000-08:00

Just hopped in to say hello to the little green frog. Hope you doing ok. I miss our nasty little talks. Hope to talk to you soon. Today is Tue and Im off work. he he he.Well Im off to school. But I will be back.

2005-12-05T17:58:00.000-08:00

Who will cry for the little girl. Who will cry for the little girl thats stands so all alone. Who will cry for the little girl that,s heart is broken, Who will cry for the little girl that just needs someone to care. Who will cry for the little girl that waits for her mothers love. Who will cry for the little girl. SHE WILL. She will cry for the little girl. So she can forgive and go on with her LIFE.

2005-12-05T16:55:00.000-08:00

Whether my illness is physical or mental; whether my body is broken on the inside or out; I am a person. I am funny, smart, and have a good heart. Take me as I am.

2005-12-05T10:43:00.000-08:00

Money Money Money, Its just a green paper. It smells nasty and it makes ppl do bad thinks for it. It cant fix a broken heart. It cant ill the sick. It cant make a person love you . An when God calls for you it cant buy more time. So that green shit ant all that. So why are we killing our self for it.

2005-12-05T07:40:00.000-08:00

Hiding the pain of a broken heart. We all do it. Some are a little better at it then others. We put on a big smile and say everything is just fine. Knowing we are lying to ourself. Someone is crying out there. Is it over a cheating husband , a ill kid, are the money we need to pay a bill. We all put on that clown face time to time. So when you see a clown walking your way. Put your hand out , Two clowns standing there is always better then one standing there alone.

2005-12-05T06:39:00.000-08:00

Shit its to cold here. We in the teens. An its snowing today. Thats one thing I hate about Bloomington IN. You never want to get out bed when its this cold. I go for drip today. Great. No Im not gone to bitch. There are ppl out there having it harder then me. I got it easy. I gone love ones by my side. Well we had nice weekend. We took the kids to Jolly Day Winter Wonderland. It was pretty with the snow falling. Tommy said we gone to go back again before christmas.

2005-12-02T17:18:00.000-08:00

Well Im asked to write again. They will read it in chuch on his Birthday Dec 16. So it I go. Hope you like it Herbert..................................................We are all here today to celebrate the life of Herbert whose death has left us feeling all the poorer. We are all very different, and we dont all know each other, but there is one important thing that we share, the trust and friendship of a good kid. To us he was like a brother. To many others he was a son, grandson, nephew, or a good friend. The shock of our sudden loss has been made greater the by the fact that herbert was still so young. We never expect the young to leave us so suddenly, and we hope that , whereever he is he has found a deep and profound peace. We are sure that the nagging uncertainties that sometimes seemed to plague him are no more...................................Herbert was our cousin, and even though we have grown apart as weve grown up, he was like a brother to us. We want to spend a few moments recalling a person who , although he was not perfect, as none of us are , tried to make his corner of the world a better by providing those of us who knew him with many memories of laughter and love. He had many friends. although his popularity is unsurprising. I believe that he never quite realized how well loved he actually was. I wish that I had been able to open his eyes and show himhow much he meant to all of us. Perhaps at last he knows how happy and honored we all are to have numbered among the people he cared for. Icertainly hope so. Herbert was a comfort to anyone who ever needed consolation because he always found a way to make us laugh. When I was asked to say something about him today, We discussed it, and I really didnt know what would be expected of me. am I supposed to go on and on about how we are all distraught over our loss? We are, but thats not what Herbert would have wanted. If he were here today, he would probably be sitting in the back cracking jokes about how solemn we,re all being. I would have to slap him on the wrist and say, Tootie, behave. He always said that he hated when we called him Tootie, but he knew that when we called him that, it meant that we loved him. .............When I think of herbert, Ill think about the good times that we had together and funny stories that he shared with all of us. When I think about him I think back about all the mischievous things that he and I did as children. It,s funny now, but we sure gave Pam a scare when we hid inhide the bathroom cabinet for hours while they searched the house and the woods for us. Needless to say we were both in trouble. That wasnt the only time that Herbert and I got in trouble together. You can bet that if we were together , we were up to no good. ...............Im sure Herbert wouldnt want us to focus too much on the accident and on his death. He would want us to think about him living , having fun, and playing the many roles he played in our lives. In some ways. Herbert was a typical young person. He liked music, hanging out with his friends and of course , girls . In other ways , Herbert was an exceptional human being. He seemed to attract people to him. he had friends of all ages and all walks of life. When he was a teenage boy, he had all of the hang-ups and concerns that a teenager has, but he was never ashamed to hug and kiss his mother in public. Though this is a memorial sevice for Herbert, we not saying good-bye for good. He ,s gone on ahead of us, to a better place. Hell watch over us (and probably laugh a good deal of the times ) and he,ll continue to touch us thoughout our lives until we meet up with him again in that glorious place. So, we wont say good-bye today, just .....We love you , Herbert and we,ll see you later.

2005-12-02T17:08:00.000-08:00

I'm A Woman
I shave my legs,sit down to pee,and I can justify any shopping spree
I don't go to the barber but a beauty salonI can get a message without a hard-on
I can balance the check book I can pump my own gas can talk to my friends about the size of my ass
my beauty's a master piece and yes, it takes longat least I can admitto others when I'm wrong
I don't drive in circle sat any cost and I don't have a problem admitting I'm lost
I never forget an important date you just gotta deal with it I'm usually late
I don't watch movies with lots of gore don't need an instant replay to remember the score
I won't lose my hair or get jock itch and just cause I'm assertive don't call me a bitch
don't say to your friends oh yeah, I can get her or in your dreams, oh dear I can do better
flowers are okay but jewellery's best look at me you idiot....not at my chest !!!
I don't have a problem with expressing my feelings I know when you're lying you look at the ceiling
DONT call me a GIRL A BABE or a CHICK
I am a WOMAN
get it? you DICK!!!!

2005-12-02T09:23:00.000-08:00

This is a few friends at work. It was taken at a White Angel party. Looks like Lisa and Kelly are not feeling a thing. Mike is feeling it all. Drink a little more girls. Mike looks like he,s gone to get lucky tonight. Way to go Mike. After you lick it I want a kiss from you. I want a taste to. Just kidding Candi , dont get your panties in a knot, take them off first. ha ha

2005-12-02T08:06:00.000-08:00

Cutting to stop the pain Cutting to forget the shame Cutting to escape the reality of life Scared to cut Scared not to Who are you? Why are you here? Look in the mirror Scared at what you see Cutting to erase the memory of what I've seen Trying to erase Every part of me The part that still sees your face The part that still hears the ugly words You've screamed at me Trying to be myself Different from the rest I will not be like you Cutting to erase the memories Of my mother's hate. .................It,s only my blood and pain. So who gives a fuck.Who am I to think I should have a great life with out pain Cut it a little deeper next time.

2005-12-02T06:49:00.000-08:00

Hey , Its me. I got school today. Damn Im gone to be a real smartass one day. Oh shit I hate a smartass lesbian. lol Thank god its friday. Im off work tonight. So I guess I will stay on here begging my chat friends. Raven be ready. My ass is always ready for a good booting. .You know you would love to boot my ass good. yea yea yea. Well Candi liked her birthday night. She cried. Hell I loved it, I got a good feel. Now I need to think of a better one next year. Oh that wont be a problem. I will be a smartass lesbian by then. Shut up Froggieeeee........... Im not tard like you.Im half tard. The other half is lesbian.

2005-12-01T14:47:00.000-08:00

Don’t forget me I’m still here Don’t leave me I’m not unreal Don’t you hear me screaming It’s not lies I am not a stranger Someone to ignore I am here for a reason Not to be scorned Can’t you see me Am I visible Can I be visible To anyone but me My heart is not hardened I still feel pain Do you hear me Listen to my cries Feel all my pain It’s all your fault I shouldn’t have to endure this It shouldn’t be real .........Please mommy I need you in my life.

2005-12-01T09:44:00.000-08:00

Oh no you not. There are kids here you two. This is Linda and fred.Well I think thats Fred. Really cant see his face.he,s a little busy at the time. An I dont know what they was thinking. I think its time for Holiday Inn you two. Froggie that was taking at one of them wild partys at Tommy,s house. An girl where did you get that outfit from. I need one of them lol. Girl you crazy. but got to love you.

2005-12-01T09:12:00.000-08:00

I have a sweet night for Candi when we get home from work. I got Sandi to go get me a doz red roes and a big bow. Oh and a bag of choclate kisses. Before we get home I want her to make a path way with the kisses from the door to the bathroom. An place the doz rose,s in the tub. I want the card to say .......... Ive kissed the ground you walk on and now Ive showerd you with roses. Love Tammy Dee..........................I think she will love it. I want her to know I love her. An it will be a little fun in it for me he he he . Oh Im bad

2005-12-01T07:11:00.000-08:00

Yummie, Nice ass Candi. Bend over a little more. It,s looking good from this side of the room. Wooo my baby is 27 today. Candi I love you sweetie. How it feels to be that old. lol Candi I dont care if you 27 or a gray old age of 99 I will still love you. I think you the best. Well Candi sorry we have to work tonight. I would love to hold you in my arms all night. Well we got many many years to do that. Candi I hope you like the gift I got you. Are you ready to pick a card. he he he. I think this gift is more for me. Pick a lick card. Please Please. ................ Love you always Candi

2005-11-30T11:15:00.000-08:00

The pages are missing from my fairy tale ending, That doesn’t stop me, I go on pretending. I’ll pretend that everything is all right, And that when I go home I don’t cry at night. I’ll tell you that everything is fine. You can’t tell because of the mask I hide behind. There’s a smile painted on my lips, While inside of me everything’s covered by an eclipse. There’s a shadow hanging over my head, I’m starting to think I’m close to being dead. Because I can’t feel anything around me, Just inside of me, so dead, so empty. Where are the missing pages, will I ever find them? Maybe they’re lost where I’ve already been.

2005-11-30T11:07:00.000-08:00

Fearful days, haunting nights. burning tears, reliving fears. Eyes wide open, too afraid to shut. Shaking steadily, crying uncontrollably. Screaming, yelling. Please help me inside. Shadows on the wall- I feel your breathe on my neck. I see your face in the darkness of the night. Shouts running through my head- reaching for the knife. i remember your fingers running over me. I was 10. And you never stopped. Why did you choose me?

2005-11-30T07:52:00.000-08:00

2005-11-30T06:58:00.000-08:00

For my wonderful Tammy.Your my friend. The one I turn to when I need somebody there to laugh with and to talk with, to understand and care for..... Your my sweetheart...... your the one I need to kiss and hold me tight, to say the words .... I LOVE YOU....... every morning , every night..... Your my sweetheart..... the one I need to have forever by my side, the one I can depend upon, in whom I can confide..... Your all Ill ever need to have a full and happy life, my special friend , my sweetheart, my dear and loving Tammy...................................Love you always Candi

2005-11-30T06:39:00.000-08:00

To my 2 crazy friends. Love you Paula and Scott. Hands off Scott. My girl needs a ring on that finger. lol An not a clit ring. She has one of them. Shhhh I didnt say that. No I think it,s time you buy the milk you cheap little fucker.What it,s gone on 2 years. An a kid ago. It,s way pass time. I feel like partying. An Im waiting for the first dance Paula. .....................................................................................Love you PS. Paula thats a fine ass you have there. he he he

2005-11-30T06:12:00.000-08:00

Yea my life was in pieces. But Candi put me back together. I was a real mess a few years ago. I had a bottle in my hand all the time. I was on my ass more then my feet. I was killing myself slowly each day. I said many times Im not drinking today. But that was a lie. I started drinking at the age of ???? hell I dont know. I lived with the shit. I would drink with my mom. I was young. I remember when I was 4 I would play and walk around with a half fulled beer bottle . I was so kool. I wanted to be like my mom. It,s funny now I look back. Today I dont want to be nothing like her. I want better for myself then sleeping on a cold floor all drunk. Thats why im gone to school . You will see mommy. Im gone to be high class one day. I will be eating with the rich. They will be saying there goes that rich bitch. lol Hell if I dont dream for myself who will. Mommy you should dream a little . It feels good. Just close your eyes and let your mine float away.

2005-11-29T08:36:00.000-08:00

I am an American and I stand proud You may have wounded me But I won't fall down I may stagger and shake I may sway and rock But I'v got sisters and brothers with whose arms I will lock I will cry for the dead Those you've taken from me But what you have done Right now you can't see You think that I'll fold like a coward and run but You have touched my heart Something you shouldn't have done You think that I'm weak for the love I have shown In all others tragedies far from my home I've reached out in compassion to those hurting souls And for you that's a reason to slay my own You don't know the giant you've awoken inside In the past I've stood silent Now it's your turn to hide Although I'll forgive you As my Lord says I should What goes around comes around and it's coming for you So with pity I write this For I know your fates set You'll get what you've given From America's best You'll see that although, in love we do walk If you hurt our breathern You will pay the cost The giants awoken yet another time He's awoken before and rode on wings from high He'll sniff you out like a rat in a trap For your destinies sealed You cannot run from that So enjoy your laughter Your toasts as you dine For the giants coming And you cannot hide For your fate has been sealed And as you look behind You'll see our flag is still flying high!

2005-11-29T07:03:00.000-08:00

Woooo Candi that was a little to hot last night. he he he. I see you still got it girl. Im gone to school with a smell on my face. An my sweetie put it there. Girl I love you . The older you get the better you are. An woooo you geting older soon. Your Birthday is in a few weeks. I need to find a good gift for you. I think and think and the only think I come up with is ME. Candi Im giving you ME. I made a deck of cards. An on the cards are nice things to do. Everyday for a month I will get you to pic one. An what the card says I will do it for you. Please pick the lick cards first. lol I think you will like it. There are 6 cards that are free cards. You can get what ever you want. 6 cards have a gift . An I will have 6 wraped gifts for them. Candi hope you like the trip I got planed for you. Sorry we cant stay longer then 3 days. But I know you will understand I cant be away that long (dialysis). Shhhhhhhhhhh Im taking my sweetie to Wisconsin sking. Mark has a friend that has a cabin there. Wooo I never been there before. We are gone with a few other friends. So it should be real fun. We gone the week of Christmas. But we will be home for Christmas.

2005-11-28T10:50:00.000-08:00

Im so chicken. They want to put a port in my chest again. I dont know why, last time it didnt work and I got sick. They so stupid, if things are working good dont fix it. I dont care what they say, Im not doing it. If they start there shit I wont go back at all. Im black and blue already. If they want to see red look at my face . Im pissed. and if they want I can show my ass there. Im a good one to bitch. They dont want to get me started. .......................Fuck........shit..........piss.............thats the King way. Kris tell them . lol No more Im tired

2005-11-28T09:51:00.000-08:00

This is Candi,s boss Mark. If we need we run to him. He,s the one that has the money and the cards we go shopping on. Love you Mark I need a ?????? lol A car would be nice. No not a car but a plane trip for Dec. Candi and I want to go on a trip for her B-day. So where we got. An it better be a good one . Only the best for my sweetie. lol An this time Im not drinking so you dont have to pick me ass off the floor. But I will have the second dance with you.

2005-11-28T09:32:00.000-08:00

Randy you a dumb little fuck.An no you cant lick me. lol I dont want you to think I like you. Im just writting to tell you Thank you. Thank you for gone in work so Candi can have the night off. She got the licking. lol Sorry. I will make it up to you next time. Met me in the back room at 9. lol yea right. You gay fuck.

2005-11-28T07:43:00.000-08:00

Shake that ass Wendy. But hands off my sweetie. 11-24-2005

2005-11-28T07:35:00.000-08:00

A roes for my sweetie. She dont feel good. I gave her my cold. I love sharing everything with her. Candi I hope you feel better soon. <><><><>Love you

2005-11-28T07:05:00.000-08:00

Damit I hate Mondays. I wanted to stay in bed and pull the blanket over my head. But I guess I cant do that. I got drip today. Shit Another day of being bored and sick. When will it stop. Guess it wont. So I better live with it. Well this weekend was nice. We took kids to Gingerbread Village. That was nice, kids liked it. After that we went eat at the steak and seafood house. Well Im here to say , never go eat with a car full of kids. They was so bad. Well maybe it was the cotton candy they ate right before. They was jumping all over. An every 5 mins one had to pee, shit are something. One even spilled his drink all over the table. Bet they was glad to see us walk out that place. By the time I got home I was pulling my hair out. An we had a few less kids that flow out the window. lol

2005-11-26T06:57:00.000-08:00

Today we taking the kids to gingerbread village. Sure, you've seen plenty of Gingerbread houses at holiday time, but have you ever seen ones 10-feet high? Lots of them? The Indianapolis City Market's Whister Plaza will turn into a old world gingerbread village complete with an apothecary, church, candy shop and bakery. In each of the large houses, all made with real gingerbread and by some of city's premier home design and construction firms, you can peer in the windows, as each one will be decorated both inside and out. Kids can even get their photos taken with Fred and Ginger Bread, the "first family" of the village. Also, on select Fridays and Saturdays during the holidays, a portion of the Historic Building will be turned into a market for holiday gifts. Items for sale, all made in Indiana, will include handmade soaps, gourmet dog treats, handcrafted woodwork, handmade jewelry and cookie seasonings Fun Fun

2005-11-26T06:30:00.000-08:00

Oh yes Im so cute. Did you think I was cute all drity in a car sleeping. Did you think I was cute laying in bed with a nigger on top of me at the age of 10. Are when I was lay-ing passed out from drinking so much. I dont think any of that is to cute. See where all this cute shit got me. Im on a machine a few times a week to just keep me alive. Oh Im cute alright. An everyday I fight with myself , not to pick up a bottle and drink myself to silly. I was cute when I cut my waste and blood was running all over as I cryed I hate myself. Everyone should be that cute. There are many ways of being cute. An Im not one of them. Sick yes , cute never.

2005-11-25T22:12:00.000-08:00

To my sweet Candi, Im just sitting here thinking about you. I think you the sweeties thing . Just wanted to tell you , you was so pretty for Turkey day. That dress made you look so sexy. I was happy with you by my side. I had alot the be thankful for. I Thank God I have you. You are the best thing in my life. You make my days brighter. Candi I love you more then you will every know. ......... Kris I thank you for being you. I think you a pretty lady. a great mom. (whity is a teenager, they all act that way) And I thank you for being there to fight with me. I just hope one day you will see the pretty lady I see then I look at you. ................ Harley you sexy thing. I thank you for having them heart to heart talks with me. I need them. You put a smile on my face everytime we talk................... Froggie I will just say two words to you Love you ...................... Sassy girl I think you a sweetheart. Your hubby has a good wife there. An I know you a good mom to your cute kids. I love that little man you have there. Sassy stay sweet as you are............................Bug you a lovly lady in my book. i wouldnt change a thing about you............................Toddy i think you a cool friend. An one day i want to pull you on the dance floor and ??????????? I better stop. ha ha ha .................. Frankie you gone to be just fine. hell you having a sweet little bundle of joy . Just one think. Love her . thats a gift from god there. ........................Wolfie be the best playa you can be..................... Keewee, Peach, Michelle, Jana. Boot Im glad to call you my friends. Thank You

2005-11-25T20:03:00.000-08:00

hello Kris, Thank you. Thank you for leting me know you was ok. Hope you know what you mean to me. Love you Kris. An Kris dont be so upset . Love will find you . It just takes a little time to find the best. An you know us Kings. Only the best will do for us. I think you found a keeper there. He sounds sweet when I talked to him. but you know me. I will kill if he gets out of line. ...........................................Love you always Kris.

2005-11-23T09:08:00.000-08:00

Another fucked up holiday. With a full house of friends and family its never that happy. Something is still missing. I just cant pin point it. But there is always a broken place in my heart. Is it the plate my mom should be eating out of? Are is it the lost of my foster mom that died two years ago. Fuck shit piss Kris I miss her alot. Are my step brother that was the world to me. Why God had to take him away from me. He was so young. Are is it Im just feeling sorry for myself. With all the love Candi gives me, something is still not right. Damn you mommy. Im losted again. I hate feeling this way. I feel I dont belong anywheres in this crazy world. An I feel so sick today. The drip is really winning this battle. Im so tired of feeling this way. An I cant do a fucking thing about it.